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Outstanding student’s: hall of fame
Hello students, this is your principal speaking.
According to religion God created all people equally, well I am here to tell you that that is a complete lie, if that was true who would be cleaning the toilets? Exactly!
Most of you will notice pictures of outstanding students on the walls across the corridors.
Unfortunately we’ve ran out of wall space, so instead we’ve decided to nail them here on cyber space instead.
Here their memory will remain for all eternity, they are not like you, you should bow down before them when you see them approaching.
Never turn your back towards them, when they speak you shall listen, and always refer to them as “Sir/Madame” at all times.
Here are some of our finest specimens:
Name: Carlos Ballseca
This
picture was taken moments before I ejaculated all over his face. He’s an
excellent student, and when I say excellent I mean very, very, excellent indeed.
You just have to know how to treat him.
Carlos joined HPS in 2002 and has been a consistently good student throughout.
When he first arrived he knew little to no English, so it was easier to take advantage of him and lure him into my office for a very private lesson with the headmaster.
Unfortunately he doesn’t speak English very well so he is not available for commentary.
Name: Greg jolofitz
Greg is what HPS students would brand as a “Rude boy”, and I can assure you he’s an extremely rude boy for all the right reasons.
In parents evening he was squeezing fresh orange juice, I had my eyes all over him. I walked up to him and said “could you please report to the headmasters office” whilst trembling.
Every now and then when I’m playing with my nipples I fantasize about him.
Students comment: “It’s been a pleasure for me being a student at this magnificent school, where people from all backgrounds cum together.”
Name: Alee Williams
She’s
a good girl, a very, very good girl.
Not only does this girl have beauty as you can plainly see but talent too.
You should see her in her horse riding outfit, with her horse whip.
We used to play a role game together called horsy, other times we used to go back to my crib and she used to sit on my face.
Students comment: “It’s a great honour to be selected as an outstanding student and I owe it to the headmaster because he taught me to believe in myself.”
Name: Fathi Aziz
Doesn’t he just look adorable? Don’t you just want to keep him warm at night?
In the beginning I was afraid his skin colour would rub off on my skin, this is because he was the first non-white student I shook hands with.
Now I’ve found the joys of interracially bonding with other students.
Fathi is also a very thoughtful student as well; he once gave me £1000 cash inside a brown paper bag, and said “You might hear a lot of rumours about me dealing crack I advise to look the other way”.
Students comment: “At first I was perplexified to find out that the perplexity of this occasion has left me unambiguously bemused. At this instant I am contented and discover this nobility to be of utmost significance, I show gratitude to you Mr. Hal.”
Name: Blingo
Representing Southeast side, Bling!
He’s heavily involved in gang warfare, also known as rap warfare, rapping about the ghettos and hoes!
Blingo likes to shave his willy, bling!
He decorates his beautiful feminine body with expensive jewellery, not only does he look feminine but his dress sense is also feminine.
Kind of reminds me of the WWF wrestler “Gold dust”.
Students comment: “How’s it hanging rude boys? I’d like to big up the sisters, bo! Peace out! I’d like to big up all the HPS crew, hold tight the drifta crew, you’re proper heavy bruvs! Respect to the brothers one love to my mother, I respect ya cuz I’ve been in ya!”
2003 © Holland Parke School